‘Merica Energy Red White & Boom – ImPEACHment – 16fl.oz (480ml)
“Treason, bribery, or other high crimes and misdemeanours.” These are the acts that Article 2, Section 4 of the United States Constitution, the greatest living document on this green earth defines as impeachable offences.
Well, the only treasonous thing about ImPEACHment flavoured Red, White & BOOM is not drinking it. The only bribery going down here is your brain bribing your mouth to drink more of it, specifically by releasing details about your mouth’s tawdry exploits in Daytona Beach for Spring Break ’08. And the only high crime or a misdemeanour is not ripping your clothes off to expose your stars n’ stripes undies when you swig back this freedom fruit, this ‘Merica medley, this libertylicious peachy keen ‘Merican dream.
- Sugar-free
- Zero calorie
- No artificial colours
- 200mg caffeine per can
Imported from the USA.
The founders of ‘Merica Snax have traveled from the rolling prairies of Montana to the Appalachians to find the best flavors that money can buy – and many money can’t. (We must never speak of the horrors of their sacrifice.) They embarked on this great quest in order that May 28th, ‘Merica Launch Day, might be the day that this great nation is finally delivered the flavors of patriotism it so desperately needs and deserves.
In these trying times, nothing will unite this nation like premium snacks and drinks crafted with love, care, no artificial colors, and most importantly, the ‘Merican Way. It doesn’t matter if you’re white, green, or purple – because we have flavors for all of those. The critical thing is that you, friend, are ‘Merican. And we are ‘Merica Snax.
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